Thursday, December 30, 2010

An idea is like a virus...

Two nights ago I sat in wonderful bliss for two and a half hours weaving my way through the winding, logical labyrinth known as Inception. With as many twist and turns as a soap opera, the movie left me staring unblinkingly at my T.V as I was too fearful to miss a beat. For two and a half hours I was enthralled over the prospect of being able to have the gears in my head turn furiously. For two and a half hours I dived into the emotional and psychological folds of the movie. And for two and a half hours I entered a fantasy world so appealing it was nearly impossible to claw myself out of.
                Any one who knows me knows that I consider myself to be somewhat of an intellectual. I have been successful in my academic endeavors, love reading classic novels, and have been kept spellbound by the raw complexities present in the concept of logic. Now this of course does not qualify me as being intelligent in any quantifiable way but is used merely to illustrate that I enjoy the process of thinking (as weird as that sounds).To me, the world is a puzzle in which I must figure out. Like the bourgeois longed for more capital, so my mind yearns to accumulate the knowledge of how the world ticks. However, as smart as I think I am, or at least how intelligent people perceive me to be, I must admit that I found it hard to keep up with all of the stories within the stories presented in the movie.  Christopher Nolan, the director of Inception, beautifully and entertainingly explored the subconscious state of mind as one entered the dream realm. Taking him nine years of research and rewrites to prefect, Nolan shed some light onto the possibilities of our brains full potentials. And while the movie is undoubtedly a work of fiction, I can’t help but wonder if Nolan himself can completely grasp the concepts that he unlocked. For you see, at the absolute core of his imaginative movie, Christopher Nolan stumbled upon some of the deepest, and undisturbed truths of reality: our subconscious projections and our desires for power over self creation.
In the movie, it’s revealed that the dreaming state of mind is one full of generation and ideation. Truly the only constraints are the sizes of our imaginations. Our dreams are where we accomplish things that the laws of this world say we can’t. Suddenly blanket forts as tall as the sky, western shootouts, and walking on walls become common everyday occurrences. It is while we sleep that we become Captains of our own ships. However, ironically it’s not our conscious but our subconscious that determines the settings and people present in our dreams.  These nouns- so to speak- are what the movie calls subconscious projections. The people, the places, and the things of our dreams are determined by what our subconscious decides to fill the void with. And this subconscious (according to the movie) does not like to share. In Inception, the subconscious is not a big fan of someone or something else sticking their grubby hands into its cookie jar. If it suspects that some outside force is tampering with its personal playground (dreams) than it is quick to attack. Like antibodies, the subconscious projections become aggressive and begin to declare full out warfare on the intruders, stopping at nothing to eradicate those who dare to subvert its rule. And here lies hints to the golden egg of truth.
   I can’t help but notice that the control hungry subconscious of the dreams of the characters presented in a fictional movie are mirror images our own realities
Now before you think that I’ve been knocked off my rocker, I pray that you hear me out. Whether we are aware of it or not our conscious and subconscious create our own little worlds. We project our own images of ourselves, see what we want to see, and hear what we want to hear. We manipulate our personalities and traits to present only the parts that we deem presentable. We attempt to take command of our lives, seeking to control every last detail. And perhaps most importantly, we, like the subconscious projections in Inception, spurn anything that even remotely tries to subvert our control.
Truth is it’s easy to project a certain aspect of yourself. It’s easy to make yourself appear certain ways to certain people. We may not even do it intentionally but subconsciously the person we desire to be is often the way people see us. For example many people see me as being biblically knowledgeable because I choose to make that aspect of me known. I preach and spit out facts often. I attend numerous church events. I have even led bible studies. However, most people honestly have no idea of the personal struggles I have wrestled with for years. Most people couldn’t begin to believe some of the issues I have experienced over 19 years of my life. And many can’t fathom some of the sins I’ve fallen into. Truth is it’s easy to make them see only the sides I want to expose.  Truth is Truth is it’s easy to play a role. Creating and manipulating our own versions of ourselves seems almost natural.
But being the character God wants us to be; now that’s what’s hard.
Our minds both conscious and subconscious don’t like intruders. We like to call the shots. We like to feel like we’re in control. We like to run our own show.  We resent those who suggest an idea that we wish we would have thought of. We rebel whenever our parents try to tell us what to do. And most dangerously of all, we reject the assistance and input of God in our lives thinking that we still have control. And this is where the true problems begin (talk about stories within a story).
You see we were created with a purpose, and that purpose is determined by God not by ourselves. We can desire to be numerous things; successful, rich, powerful, respected, famous etc. but truth is unless it’s what God wills it will not happen. This conflict over what we want vs. what God desires is why it is so hard for us to let God in. We’ve spent our whole lives building armored fortresses to keep trespassers out, raising armies to attack any foreign tampering, and manning the walls to defend and protect our control. But that’s the kicker: we’ve spent our whole lives fighting for and defending something that was never ours to begin with. In Galatians 2:20 it says, “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives within me.” Our lives aren’t in our control. Because of what Christ did for us, when we chose to follow him, we sign off on our own authority; we effectively answer the call to die to ourselves. When we chose to call ourselves Christians, we are made into a new creation ( 2 Cor. 5:17). God, the designer of the Universe, becomes the author our lives. And every author has the right to fill his pages how he/chooses.
Now I’m not saying that realizing that God is ultimately in control will instantly cause us to lose our identities, but it does call for us to realize that apart from Him we can do nothing (John 15:5). If we are to truly live the life that we were intended for then it’s about time we start making Him more and ourselves less (John 3:30).
An idea is like a virus, but when it’s not our own idea we’re the ones who begin to feel sick. Only by dying to these selfish intentions and to our defenses will we genuinely come alive. So I leave you with one last question: Who are you living for?

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Oh come all ye faithful

As the weather outside finally begins to embrace its frosty facet, and as the annual twinkles of ROYGBIV begin to shine from their little frosted homes, I can’t help but feel giddy. Why? Because these signs along with the miniature tree that has been in my suitemates’ room since early November are sure indications that Christmas is right around the bend. In fact, as I am writing this blog right at this very second, December 25th is only 19 days, 2 hours, 11 minutes, and 27 seconds away. No I’m not some crazy fanatic who keeps a continual countdown until Christmas rolls by (that’s what the internet is for), but I include this seemingly insignificant detail to illustrate how dear we hold this holiday and time of season in our hearts. Does any other holiday have such an extensive list of family traditions? Does any other holiday have as many advertisements? Does any other holiday spark enough fire in our hearts to risk getting on a slippery, ice covered roof solely to adorn our house in colored lights? If your family is anything like mine, than the answer is clearly Of Course Not. To even suggest a rival holiday would be like suggesting 2 +2= 5. Throughout the world and especially throughout America, it seems as if Christmas has enough power to create eternal memories, has the ability to make time standstill, and has the capacity to wipe away our fears and failures of the previous months. Now I’m aware that many people also feel the stinging of tears around this time as they are often reminded of the death of a beloved, or at the recognition of their self imposed loneliness, but for the sake of simplicity and generalizations I think we can agree that during Christmas we seem to enter a bubble of tranquility and happiness- or an undisturbed snow globe perhaps may be more fitting.
Normally I’m one of the first to advocate getting the old tree and ornaments down from the attic. But this year (and maybe it’s due to the fact that I’m away from all of the nutcrackers, garland, and tinsel for the first time in my 19 years of existence)I have a heavier heart than normal. At first I wasn’t really sure why I felt so sorrowful at a time as joyful as Christmas, but then it dawned on me as I listened to a church service online this morning. The pastor that was preaching this morning proposed the idea that somewhere in the last few decades our outlooks on Jesus and on the good ole Saint Nick have become blurred. I must admit this was a very intriguing idea to me and a somewhat provoking one at that. On one hand you had a man/God, who lived with 12 disciples in the Middle East over 2000 years ago, and on the other you have a red clad, rotund, pink cheeked, white bearded myth who received its origin from the Dutch hundreds of years later. How could any sane human being confuse the two? Surely either this pastor was insane or there was a case of mistaken identity that even Shakespeare would laugh at.  For a few minutes I pondered and even scoffed at anyone who could get the One who walked on water confused with the one who flies a sled. But then it hit me, and it hit me hard. This crazy pastor may just have a point.
Have we reduced God to a mere Santa-like figure?
Of course many of you many now think that after this rhetorical question I too have lost some of my marbles, but please indulge me a little bit. In today’s society it appears that we think God is some kind of figure similar to Santa Claus. If we do good deeds, God will reward us with his grace and mercy, and perhaps even bestow us with gifts and blessings. If we do bad deeds, God will revoke his hand from our lives and remove his grace from us. Basically, our whole faith now totters on the Good and Naughty List. But does it say anywhere in the Bible that Jesus came or died so that we may act as model citizens? Or does it ever say that making errors in judgment would result in the revocation of our salvation? According to Titus 3:5 “He saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy” (NIV).  It is by grace and by grace alone that we are saved. Christ, and this is where He strays from most other major religions, did not teach that one had to first be good to then receive His love, but instead taught that by His mercy and by His grace He has extended His hand to us in hopes that we may leave our sins for the greener grass on His side.
So what then does this mean for our faith, for our culture, and for our cornerstones of thought? Are the traditions and associations of Christmas wrong? Is that jolly ole Santa Claus an idol or vice? Am I suggesting to not celebrate the seasons? By all means no. I do not wish to discourage anyone from rejoicing in this time of the year, and in fact rather encourage everyone to plug themselves into the contagious festivities. But I do want to suggest (and I know you have probably heard this thousands of times before) that you rethink the purpose of this holiday.

And I hope that you rediscover the true Christ behind Christmas.